Farewell to My Best Friend

I don’t know why eulogies for dogs aren’t a thing.  Maybe they are and I just haven’t seen one before. But I have lived almost 14 years with the same dog, and having to say goodbye to him is like losing a family member.

So, like anyone else, he deserves one last send off:

Leighlan, who was named after Dog the Bounty Hunter’s son, was adopted in 2006 on a whim. I literally went out to Walmart to purchase a TV and somehow got sidetracked and ended up at the Humane Society, back in the day, when it was near Furman, which was 40 miles from where I lived. Don’t even ask me how. I don’t know. 

My fiancé at the time was livid that I brought home another mouth to feed. Being headstrong and an animal lover, I brushed it off. Leighlan became my sweet boy, my big boy, my baby boy.

You see, I love dogs, all dogs, even the angry, cantankerous ones, but something about this big black lab and his little snaggle tooth just brought me so much joy. It really is immeasurable.  

Leighlan NMN Buckingham

You see friends, this bond was not just a regular human canine bond. Oh no. This bond was formed because we survived a living hell together. A hell where both of us were abused. A hell where on any given night, our lives were at risk.  Over time, he was thrown outside and chained up like a meaningless junkyard dog, and wasn’t allowed to come inside. I was refused the right to bring him into MY HOME, the home that I paid for, and his livelihood was used in various forms and fashions to  maintain a level of control over me. When I finally got the courage to leave, I made sure I took Leigh with me. I knew he wouldn’t survive if I left him behind. 

Very Good Boy

He lived four years on that chain, and the day I left, I vowed to him that I would give him the best and most loving life that was humanly possible, and I promised him that he would never be chained up again.

After life on a chain, his manners were lacking, but he tried hard to adjust to having a big yard to run in and a nice cozy dog house to sleep in. By that, I mean he stayed on the porch and was never too far from his mama. He had to have his eyes, or ears, on me at all times.

He was very protective of me, of course, and didn’t like men, for good reason, nor did he like children. When my daughter was born, I was so terrified that I was going to have to rehome him because of this, but the moment he saw her, he fell head over tails in love with her. Their bond was eminent. 

"I got you..." - Leighlan

 He was there for me through more chaos and happiness than any one person has ever been. Two marriages. Two divorces. The birth of my daughter. Depression. Anxiety. Good times. Lots of laughter. And Heartbreak.

He would lay on me to heal me through osmosis whether it was illness or depression. He pulled me from the darkest corners of my own mind and was a constant reminder that I was loved, that he needed me, and that we could get through anything together. He was there for me when I felt so alone, when no one, not even my family, understood what I was going through. When I was at my lowest, when I was at my ugliest, when I was misunderstood, when I felt invisible, and when my screams for help were falling on deaf ears, he was right there, loving me through it. He never asked for anything in return, except maybe some of my dinner.

He was my sickly one, and survived seizures, heartworms, a flea allergy that cost me thousands of dollars, and towards the end, the passing of blood and prostate issues. About five years ago his hips began to fail and we found out that he had hip dysplasia.  Two years ago, after several scary screaming fits, he was diagnosed with arthritis in his back. He was in pain but you never would’ve known it by looking at him.

"I got you..." - D

He has brought me so much love and joy, and has been the very best friend a girl could ever ask for, and now it is my turn to be here for him.   I want to be selfish and cling to him for as long as I possibly can, but as I look at him struggling to get off his pillow to welcome me home, my heart is saddened because I know it is time to let him go.

He is the epitome of a good boy. 

I will miss his constant chatter, his muffled big boy bark, his little dreamy coos, his groan when I rub his velvet ears, and the sound of his nails tap dancing behind me as he follows me around the house.

I can’t remember life without his sweet face, and I know life will never be the same without him. 

Thank you for loving me through it all. Run free baby boy.

Until we meet again.

July 2006 - January 30, 2020